In The Depths...

...Of my computer, I have found writing from when I was a 16 year old who felt...obligated to pitch in her ten cents. I must admit, it's definitely entertaining. Here is the raw uncut thought from little B.

"Whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it is very important that you do it because you can't know. You can't ever really know the meaning of your life, you don't need to. Just know that your life has meaning... Every life does, whether it lasts one hundred years or one hundred seconds. Every life and every death changes the world in its own way. Ghandi knew this. He knew his life would mean something to someone, somewhere, somehow. And he knew with just as much certainty that he could never know that meaning. He understood that enjoying and bettering his life and the lives of those around him should be of much greater concern then understanding it. And so do I. You can't know. So don't take it for granted, but also don't take it too seriously. Don't postpone what you want. Don't leave anything misunderstood. Make sure the people you care about know. Make sure they know how you really feel, because just like that... it could end."

Haha, I was quite naive, but also had a pseudo-sense of wisdom that made me feel elevated.

Xoxo,
B

Sonnet for love? Or for hate? You decide.

Love being a greatly mystical thing,

Deceives us all in many ways.

Leaves me with different churning feelings,

Being tossed around mindlessly in a bay.

The water’s are whispering angrily,

Pent up emotions spilling out and spreading.

Thoughts of you make me shake feverishly,

And every moment I spend regretting.

Our relationship based on nothing

More than empty words, Lies you always told

Made me despise your very being.

Your furniture, consider is now sold.

Wishes to end you, consume all my thoughts

Of being together now I am just lost.

Fall for what your heart desires

When you see that person the world stops.
No amount of lies, truths, or even the past matters to you, and just for a moment you feel complete.
For the time we have is small, so every sunrise and every time the moon sets life stops as if it were a broken clock.
It's true when we are hurt  we fall hard to the dirt, but the thought of  seeing them glow as they smile is.
Being True to yourself is like telling your heart not to beat to the sound of happiness.
Breaking down to tears takes about as much time to pour water to a glass.
Minds loose the ability to think during this phase of life.
Eyes are blind even when open to sight of love, hate, confusion to the inner being of ones self and soul.
When mountains crumble it's the prime example of the struggle of love talking.
Instead of running your body and mind are walking without thought your heart is the thing crawling.
No more games  or pieces to be played just truth to be told.
As we progress to the future our life line tell no answers at all.
Though you can plan you don't know what Gods plans are to ones next journey may hold.
So if  any of us blink we could miss out on the thing called bold risk.
The path below the cliff make us look past the over fake thought of the law of L.O.V.E.
So being human we just fall.
Rather than hearing the beat in our own head many listen to the words spoken by others.
After the feelings are brought out, the one action they make is duck hide and run.
As if the game of dodge ball  resembles our human emotions.
What hopes and dreams when reality is never what it seems.
So we just shut up and fall for what our heart desires.

True statement

A girl whose silent is in more pain than when she's loud.

Dear Blaise,

Dear Blaise,
I miss you. Nothing can bring you back. But the memory of you stays fresh in my mind. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. We all miss you, your family and mine. Blaise, as you were my everything, I realized what you left behind for me. All the smiles, laughter, and joy and not a single tear. You made sure to keep me happy without even knowing when your time would end. We were happy. I love you forever and always,
B

P.S.- I still have that ring pop you proposed to me with when we were 6. It's the oldest memory I have.