Can't Stand It?

No I can’t stand it. I can NOT stand being that girl that he just talks to as if she’s just another part of his mind. I can’t stand being so insignificant and tiny. It’s putting my emotions down. I can’t just be friends with this guy. He’s my best friend and nothing more .I can’t seem to tell myself that. He is hopelessly searching for the one girl who can meet certain criteria. Every time he mentions all the things his girlfriend needs to be my heart is screaming “That’s me!!!....but I guess I am too obvious of a choice you can try all the others, get hurt, and then come back ‘round to me.” I can’t stand not being able to be honest with you. I want to stop making up romantic interests for you to believe that I don’t love you. Even though I know that you will always be there for me, it’s not enough. Not enough for my heart to remain stable every time I see you. Do you not get that I need you right now? I understand your current situation: still broken from a love that you wish still existed or was at least reciprocated. I WANT to make you feel better. I KNOW that no one could ever live up to your first love. But I would do my best to keep you happy. I would NEVER break your heart, hurt you, or shy away from you. Knowing you like I do, I admire your strength. “Strength in what” you ask me. Your strength in every situation that life has put you through is commendable. Life has been the biggest bitch to everyone but especially you. But since you don’t know the powers of your strength let me tell you what you have accomplished. You have been loved and used. You have been stabbed in the heart ruthlessly as if with an icicle on a cold winter day. I never knew that I could like someone with this much force behind it. Every time I tell my mind to forget it because you are out of my league, it stubbornly refuses me and says “No I will not rest until he knows how I feel about him.” But it IS supposed to be “Mind over matter” right? Supposing that it IS. What would my next move be? You would tell me to talk to the guy but you wouldn’t know that it was you. So I wouldn’t be able to say “I’m talking to him right now” or else you would figure out and it would be really awkward. SO here is where I try ending this conversation before I slip up and give it away that the person that I strongly like is you. Then we refocus onto your life. And from there it normally drifts over onto your love life. That’s normally where it starts getting really awkward for me to be giving you advice. Because I am basically helping you get with another girl that’s not me. But still even if you don’t love me back as a best friend it’s my duty to help you through life’s worst situations and watch you shine at your best moments. So the last thing to say is:
I Love You